The Pursuit of the House-Boat Page 3

  III

  THE SEARCH-PARTY IS ORGANIZED

  "Well, Mr. Holmes," said Sir Walter Raleigh, after three rousing cheers,led by Hamlet, had been given with a will by the assembled spirits, "afterthis demonstration in your honor I think it is hardly necessary for me toassure you of our hearty co-operation in anything you may venture tosuggest. There is still manifest, however, some desire on the part of theever-wise King Solomon and my friend Confucius to know how you deduce thatKidd has sailed for London, from the cigar end which you hold in yourhand."

  "THREE ROUSING CHEERS, LED BY HAMLET, WERE GIVEN"]

  "I can easily satisfy their curiosity," said Sherlock Holmes, genially. "Ibelieve I have already proven that it is the end of Kidd's cigar. Themarks of the teeth have shown that. Now observe how closely it issmoked--there is barely enough of it left for one to insert between histeeth. Now Captain Kidd would hardly have risked the edges of his mustacheand the comfort of his lips by smoking a cigar down to the very light ifhe had had another; nor would he under any circumstances have smoked itthat far unless he were passionately addicted to this particular brand ofthe weed. Therefore I say to you, first, this was his cigar; second, itwas the last one he had; third, he is a confirmed smoker. The result, hehas gone to the one place in the world where these Connecticut hand-rolledHavana cigars--for I recognize this as one of them--have a realpopularity, and are therefore more certainly obtainable, and that is atLondon. You cannot get so vile a cigar as that outside of a London hotel.If I could have seen a quarter-inch more of it, I should have been abledefinitely to locate the hotel itself. The wrappers unroll to a degreethat varies perceptibly as between the different hotels. The Metropolecigar can be smoked a quarter through before its wrapper gives way; theGrand wrapper goes as soon as you light the cigar; whereas the Savoy,fronting on the Thames, is surrounded by a moister atmosphere than theothers, and, as a consequence, the wrapper will hold really until mostpeople are willing to throw the whole thing away."

  "It is really a wonderful art!" said Solomon.

  "The making of a Connecticut Havana cigar?" laughed Holmes. "Not at all.Give me a head of lettuce and a straw, and I'll make you a box."

  "I referred to your art--that of detection," said Solomon. "Your logic isperfect; step by step we have been led to the irresistible conclusion thatKidd has made for London, and can be found at one of these hotels."

  "And only until next Tuesday, when he will take a house in theneighborhood of Scotland Yard," put in Holmes, quickly, observing a sneeron Hawkshaw's lips, and hastening to overwhelm him by further evidence ofhis ingenuity. "When he gets his bill he will open his piratical eyes sowide that he will be seized with jealousy to think of how much morerefined his profession has become since he left it, and out of mere piquehe will leave the hotel, and, to show himself still cleverer than hismodern prototypes, he will leave his account unpaid, with the result thatthe affair will be put in the hands of the police, under whichcircumstances a house in the immediate vicinity of the famous policeheadquarters will be the safest hiding-place he can find, as was instancedby the remarkable case of the famous Penstock bond robbery. A certainchurch-warden named Hinkley, having been appointed cashier thereof, robbedthe Penstock Imperial Bank of L1,000,000 in bonds, and, fleeing to London,actually joined the detective force at Scotland Yard, and was detailed tofind himself, which of course he never did, nor would he ever have beenfound had he not crossed my path."

  Hawkshaw gazed mournfully off into space, and Le Coq muttered profanewords under his breath.

  "We're not in the same class with this fellow, Hawkshaw," said Le Coq."You could tap your forehead knowingly eight hours a day through alleternity with a sledge-hammer without loosening an idea like that."

  "Nevertheless I'll confound him yet," growled the jealous detective. "Ishall myself go to London, and, disguised as Captain Kidd, will lead thisvisionary on until he comes there to arrest me, and when these clubmembers discover that it is Hawkshaw and not Kidd he has run to earth,we'll have a great laugh on Sherlock Holmes."

  "I am anxious to hear how you solved the bond-robbery mystery," saidSocrates, wrapping his toga closely about him and settling back againstone of the spiles of the wharf.

  "So are we all," said Sir Walter. "But meantime the House-boat is gettingfarther away."

  "Not unless she's sailing backwards," sneered Noah, who was still nursinghis resentment against Sir Christopher Wren for his reflections upon thespeed of the Ark.

  "What's the hurry?" asked Socrates. "I believe in making haste slowly; andon the admission of our two eminent naval architects, Sir Christopher andNoah, neither of their vessels can travel more than a mile a week, and ifwe charter the _Flying Dutchman_ to go in pursuit of her we can catch herbefore she gets out of the Styx into the Atlantic."

  "Jonah might lend us his whale, if the beast is in commission," suggestedMunchausen, dryly. "I for one would rather take a state-room in Jonah'swhale than go aboard the _Flying Dutchman_ again. I made one trip on the_Dutchman_, and she's worse than a dory for comfort; furthermore, I don'tsee what good it would do us to charter a boat that can't land oftenerthan once in seven years, and spends most of her time trying to double theCape of Good Hope."

  "My whale is in commission," said Jonah, with dignity. "But BaronMunchausen need not consider the question of taking a state-room aboard ofher. She doesn't carry second-class passengers. And if I took any stock inthe idea of a trip on the _Flying Dutchman_ amounting to a seven years'exile, I would cheerfully pay the Baron's expenses for a round trip."

  "We are losing time, gentlemen," suggested Sherlock Holmes. "This is amoment, I think, when you should lay aside personal differences andpersonal preferences for immediate action. I have examined the wake of theHouse-boat, and I judge from the condition of what, for want of a betterterm, I may call the suds, when she left us the House-boat was making tenknots a day. Almost any craft we can find suitably manned ought to be ableto do better than that; and if you could summon Charon and ascertain whatboats he has at hand, it would be for the good of all concerned."

  "That's a good plan," said Johnson. "Boswell, see if you can find Charon."

  "I am here already, sir," returned the ferryman, rising. "Most of my boatshave gone into winter quarters, your Honor. The _Mayflower_ went into drydock last week to be calked up; the _Pinta_ and the _Santa Maria_ are slowand cranky; the _Monitor_ and the _Merrimac_ I haven't really had time topatch up; and the _Valkyrie_ is two months overdue. I cannot make up mymind whether she is lost or kept back by excursion steamers. Hence Ireally don't know what I can lend you. Any of these boats I have named youcould have had for nothing; but my others are actively employed, and Icouldn't let them go without a serious interference with my business."

  The old man blinked sorrowfully across the waters at the opposite shore.It was quite evident that he realized what a dreadful expense the club wasabout to be put to, and while of course there would be profit in it forhim, he was sincerely sorry for them.

  "I repeat," he added, "those boats you could have had for nothing, but theothers I'd have to charge you for, though of course I'll give you adiscount."

  And he blinked again, as he meditated upon whether that discount should bean eighth or one-quarter of one per cent.

  "The _Flying Dutchman_," he pursued, "ain't no good for your purposes.She's too fast. She's built to fly by, not to stop. You'd catch up withthe House-boat in a minute with her, but you'd go right on and disappearlike a visionary; and as for the Ark, she'd never do--with all respect toMr. Noah. She's just about as suitable as any other waterloggedcattle-steamer'd be, and no more--first-rate for elephants and kangaroos,but no good for cruiser-work, and so slow she wouldn't make a ripple highenough to drown a gnat going at the top of her speed. Furthermore, she'sgot a great big hole in her bottom, where she was stove in by runningafoul of--Mount Arrus-root, I believe it was called when Captain Noah wentcruising with that menagerie of his."

  "That's an unmitigated falsehood!" cried Noah, angr
ily. "This man talkslike a professional amateur yachtsman. He has no regard for facts, butsimply goes ahead and makes statements with an utter disregard of thetruth. The Ark was not stove in. We beached her very successfully. I saythis in defence of my seamanship, which was top-notch for my day."

  "Couldn't sail six weeks without fouling a mountain-peak!" sneered Wren,perceiving a chance to get even.

  "The hole's there, just the same," said Charon. "Maybe she was acentreboard, and that's where you kept the board."

  "The hole is there because it was worn there by one of the elephants,"retorted Noah. "You get a beast like the elephant shuffling one of hisfore-feet up and down, up and down, a plank for twenty-four hours a dayfor forty days in one of your boats, and see where your boat would be."

  "Thanks," said Charon, calmly. "But the elephants don't patronize my line.All the elephants I've ever seen in Hades waded over, except Jumbo, and hereached his trunk across, fastened on to a tree limb with it, and swunghimself over. However, the Ark isn't at all what you want, unless you aregoing to man her with a lot of centaurs. If that's your intention, I'dcharter her; the accommodations are just the thing for a crew of thatkind."

  "Well, what do you suggest?" asked Raleigh, somewhat impatiently. "You'vetold us what we can't do. Now tell us what we can do."

  "I'd stay right here," said Charon, "and let the ladies rescue themselves.That's what I'd do. I've had the honor of bringing 'em over here, and Ithink I know 'em pretty well. I've watched 'em close, and it's my privateopinion that before many days you'll see your club-house sailing backhere, with Queen Elizabeth at the hellum, and the other ladies on thefor'ard deck knittin' and crochetin', and tearin' each other to pieces ina conversational way, as happy as if there never had been any Captain Kiddand his pirate crew."

  "That suggestion is impossible," said Blackstone, rising. "Whether therelief expedition amounts to anything or not, it's good to be set going.The ladies would never forgive us if we sat here inactive, even if theywere capable of rescuing themselves. It is an accepted principle of lawthat this climate hath no fury like a woman left to herself, and we've gotenough professional furies hereabouts without our aiding in augmenting theranks. We must have a boat."

  "It'll cost you a thousand dollars a week," said Charon.

  "I'll subscribe fifty," cried Hamlet.

  "I'll consult my secretary," said Solomon, "and find out how many of mywives have been abducted, and I'll pay ten dollars apiece for theirrecovery."

  "That's liberal," said Hawkshaw. "There are sixty-three of 'em on board,together with eighty of his fiancees. What's the quotation on fiancees,King Solomon?"

  "Nothing," said Solomon. "They're not mine yet, and it's their fathers'business to get 'em back. Not mine."

  Other subscriptions came pouring in, and it was not long before everybodysave Shylock had put his name down for something. This some one of themore quick-witted of the spirits soon observed, and, with recklessdisregard of the feelings of the Merchant of Venice, began to call:"Shylock! Shylock! How much?"

  The Merchant tried to leave the pier, but his path was blocked.

  "Subscribe, subscribe!" was the cry. "How much?"

  "Order, gentlemen, order!" said Sir Walter, rising and holding a bottlealoft. "A black person by the name of Friday, a valet of our friend Mr.Crusoe, has just handed me this bottle, which he picked up ten minutes agoon the bank of the river a few miles distant. It contains a bit of paper,and may perhaps give us a clew based upon something more substantial thaneven the wonderful theories of our new brother Holmes."

  A BLACK PERSON BY THE NAME OF FRIDAY FINDS A BOTTLE]

  A deathly silence followed the chairman's words, as Sir Walter drew acork-screw from his pocket and opened the bottle. He extracted the paper,and, as he had surmised, it proved to be a message from the missingvessel. His face brightening with a smile of relief, Sir Walter read,aloud:

  "Have just emerged into the Atlantic. Club in hands of Kidd and fortyruffians. One hundred and eighty-three ladies on board. Headed for theAzores. Send aid at once. All well except Xanthippe, who is seasick in thebilliard-room. (Signed) Portia."

  "Aha!" cried Hawkshaw. "That shows how valuable the Holmes theory is."

  "Precisely," said Holmes. "No woman knows anything about seafaring, butPortia is right. The ship is headed for the Azores, which is the firsttack needed in a windward sail for London under the present conditions."

  The reply was greeted with cheers, and when they subsided the cry forShylock's subscription began again, but he declined.

  "I had intended to put up a thousand ducats," he said, defiantly, "butwith that woman Portia on board I won't give a red obolus!" and with thathe wrapped his cloak about him and stalked off into the gathering shadowsof the wood.

  And so the funds were raised without the aid of Shylock, and the shapelytwin-screw steamer the _Gehenna_ was chartered of Charon, and put underthe command of Mr. Sherlock Holmes, who, after he had thanked the companyfor their confidence, walked abstractedly away, observing in strictestconfidence to himself that he had done well to prepare that bottlebeforehand and bribe Crusoe's man to find it.

  "For now," he said, with a chuckle, "I can get back to earth again free ofcost on my own hook, whether my eminent inventor wants me there or not. Inever approved of his killing me off as he did at the very height of mypopularity."